Cold Turkey

It sucks when you are in the same room as someone or even worse they are sitting next to you and you miss them. I learned in my development of self class that people do what they need to do to protect and maintain their healthy sense of self and I think that is how I can let people go so easily or just stop seeing someone/depriving myself cold turkey. Being close to someone and sharing something with them for an elongated period of time it gets hard to be something different. It's hard hearing about them and other people or them moving on. I have seen people hold on to people, calling their after the break up relationship a friendship, when in reality their holding on to hope that they will one day be back to being in a relationship. I have done that. I have been that "friend". I have been girlfriend number 2 after being girlfriend number 1. That person wants you and you want them but one or both of you are somewhere else straddling the fence. Wanting to move on but too scared to take the chance with someone else or just knowing that you won't settle for what their dishing out. I will admit that it's hard to get to me. It's hard for me to let people in but when I know I want to see where something can go I put my best foot forward and no one can expect me to open up completely overnight. But you can expect some progression :) over time. I don't really know what else to say but I am straddling the fence...somewhere between regret that things ever went as far as they did and sadness that things aren't the way they once were.